Friday, 13 January 2017

Coming back?

I talked to my therapist today and I was complaining as usual about how many of my attempts at blogging go unnoticed because no one else is interested in the things I write about. Either this or I suck at writing. And she offered me a solution. She asked why won't I write about it in English. And I started thinking about it.

I have this need to express my thoughts and opinions. And what makes it even worse, I think that my thoughts are important. Unfortunately none of the people I know IRL (not counting my mom) are interested in the stuff that sends my pulse racing. So I figured that blogging would be the answer. Putting my thoughts out there on the internet for like minded people to find and appreciate. I won't say it was my only aspiration, but having a little feedback wouldn't hurt now, won't it?

But the more I post to my main blog, the more disappointing it gets. I feel like the town's crazy lady. People are watching but don't want to have anything to do with me. Or at least that's the kind of picture my imagination is painting when time after time I don't get a reaction, or get a few encouraging comments when now and then I spit out a post "that's it! I'm quitting!". Those seem like pity comments. And if that's all I'll get, then I don't see any reason to continue...

It's not working. I'll stop beating the dead horse.

And that's when this blog comes into play. At first I thought about starting a new blog. Mostly because things I want to write about are not only books and cake recipes. I'm still thinking about it... I'm not quite sure what to do next. But just for now I've decided to write a few words and update this blog. Just to get the thought out of my head.

Either way I just needed to vent a little bit, so thanks for bearing with me.

Stay tuned. I'll keep you posted.


  1. Hi Halyna,

    When I sw your name I guessed you were Ukrainian. (Now how did I know that?) Firstly, my wife is from Kiev, now living in the UK. I've been there seveveral timesi'm amazed how well younger people speak English - humbling for me with just my halting French.

    I don't know whether you steer clear of politics, but I'd be interested in your thoughts on the Eastern Ukraine situation - how unsettling is it; is history repeating itself (Kievan Rus / Steppe politics / successive invaders)?

    My son-in-law is studying in the US and can't go home for fear of being conscripted. He is, in effect, stateless.

    Then there is Ukraine's rocky road to EU membership and tackling endemic corruption (police, politicians, public adninistration, etc). Do its citizens worry about that or are they innured with it? What may you be bursting to say, but perhaps fearful of uttering?

    1. Hi! Thank you for commenting!

      I don't follow the news too closely because it's too upsetting for me. And I honestly don't see many advances in the situation. It seems like every day the news go "The anti-Ukrainian forces have breached the peace agreement 15+ times today". It's hard for me to understand what's going on and where it is going. Mostly that's due to the way our government treats the whole situation. Personally I think that they try to use the conflict as a means of manipulating and intimidating the people of Ukraine, to distract their attention from every other issue in our country (and there's a lot of issues).

      There are a lot of people in the same situation as you son-in-law. I've heard the most ridiculous stories about how people get conscripted. It's scary, what they're doing to people. I feel as bad for the people who volunteer to go to war (I know, they have their motifs, but I refuse to understand them).

      It's hard to say if the history is repeating itself, because I personally think that we haven't ready moved forward much since the fall of the Soviet Union. Kievan Rus was a mighty state. Modern post-soviet Ukraine never really tried to become one (most Ukrainians won't agree with me on that).

      What's really upsetting me at the moment, are the fake problems that the government is using to distract people from the economic problems. Like the language problem, for example. And as you've said, corruption is a huge problem. The way of dealing with this corruption is also used to manipulate people. They say "Don't pay 50 hryvnias for a doctor's visit", and show off their e-declarations. And at the same time they do everything to make life insufferable for small business owners, technically making them either criminals, or bankrupt.

      Ukrainian citizens worry about that all the time. But in the wrong context. They care about patriotism and doing everything by the law. But the problem is... many of our laws are designed in a way, that people have no choice but to break them all the time. The whole system is broken. People want the government to fix everything (our rotten and corrupted government) and don't take responsibility for their own well-being.

      There seems to be only one political party that is sane enough to talk about the real problems. And not because they want to get their share. It's a party of entrepreneurs (5.10, Gennady Balashov is the leader). They're getting mocked a lot, and not taken seriously (because "to hell with capitalism!", I guess). But at least they're sending out the right messages.

      Another problem is conspiracy theories. Many people seem to think that there's this evil plan to destroy Ukraine. And that Putin is the mastermind. But if there wasn't Putin, there would be someone else.

      I say whatever I feel like saying. I used to have a blog in Ukrainian, where I would occasionally write about politics and other issues. But I've stopped updating it. Not because I'm afraid to speak up, but because I don't see that many people to listen to a different opinion.